Harriette Cole: The trainee has been telling everyone I flirted with him

DEAR HARRIETTE: I was given the task of training a new employee at work. I’ve trained several employees before. I understand the importance of being gracious and kind to new employees, as it is easy to become intimidated by a new job, so I go out of my way to be super kind to newbies.

I found out a few days ago that the trainee has been telling all of my colleagues that I was flirting with him the entire time I trained him!

I am not sure if he was confused by my kindness or if he just decided to tell a blatant lie, but my feelings are hurt by the accusation. What should I do?

Lying Trainee

DEAR LYING TRAINEE: You need to take action to protect yourself. Speak to HR immediately and let them know what is going on.

Describe how you trained this person and the feedback that you are getting from colleagues. Ask for guidance on how to handle this situation.

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It could be recommended that you have a follow-up meeting with the trainee where you express your concern about what you have heard. You can ask directly what behaviors he considered flirtatious, and you can explain that your intention was simple kindness.

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With HR’s blessing, you can apologize for doing or saying anything that made the trainee uncomfortable as you assure him that you wanted nothing more than to be friendly and supportive.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I’ve been keeping up with a high-profile celebrity trial that deals with domestic violence between a man and a woman.

My boyfriend and I were discussing the trial the other day over the phone. He was adamant about defending the male celebrity, even though he had been physically violent toward the female celebrity. He made a comment about how the woman “probably deserved it.”

I was shocked and appalled that he would say something like that.

After hearing my reaction, my boyfriend insisted that he would never hit a woman himself.

I am not sure how safe I …read more

Source:: The Mercury News – Latest News

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